I know, that made absolutely no sense. But it seemed like the best way to put it.
I guess it is a combination of the two things that can get me down if I dwell on it. For starters, I am beginning to feel very old. I have a birthday coming up, a sort of mile-stone birthday...and for the first time in my life, I wish it wasn’t coming. I wish I didn’t have to get any older. I wish I could stall time and finish things I have yet to do.
I’m really overreacting. When you find out how old I’m going to be, you’ll laugh out loud. I am not old, and I know that. But I’m older than I ever have been before, and I guess the seriousness of the fact that I can’t go back and change past events is really sinking in.
Maybe that is a sign of maturity?? Ha!
And then the evil in this world. Ya’ll, it is depressing. As time goes on, sin seems more prevalent than ever...and often it hurts. I mean, how do you react when 6-9 year old kids ask prayer for the family of a girl that committed suicide? These are just young children, already having to face the reality of suicide. It seems like that shouldn't be so!!
And last night, I had a similar conversation with that same group of young kids about the Boston events. It was enough to break my heart.
“I heard there was people running and they had bombs in the finish line.”
“Who would put bombs there?”
“I heard that one girl lost a limb….what is a limb??”
And finally, one 7 year-old gal summed it up:
“Those people who put those bombs there must not know about God.”
How do you even begin to try to explain something so horrific to these young children? What happened to the innocency they are supposed to have?
I’ll admit, when the news of the Boston events first started to come over my Facebook newsfeed {yep, that is where I get the latest} I just wanted to close my computer and pretend I didn’t know about it. I was just so tired of dealing with this sin-cursed world, enough is enough already!!
My bottom-line feeling in all these above situations is “come quickly, Lord!” Oh, it seems if we could but just get to heaven - like, yesterday - and not have to deal with earth any longer! Could anything be sweeter?
But I have to stop myself, and think...why do I desire heaven? To get away from earth? To live in a perfect place with no more sin? To not have to face my own sin and deal with myself each day?
Is my desire simply to walk streets of gold, or see loved ones waiting there? Am I looking for my mansion, home, and crown?
Or do I desire to worship and glorify God?
Yes, all those other things are wonderful benefits that we will have in heaven, and I don’t think it is wrong to look forward to them. But really, when we get there, I think all of that will pale in comparison to one thing: worship.
It is what we were created for - to glorify Him.
Once we are in heaven, glorifying God will be our supreme desire. We will take our crowns and cast them at His feet...not keeping any of the glory for ourselves. Worshiping Him will consume our every moment.
And then the thought...why not now?
Yes, the earth is wicked and vile and filthy. Yes, I am aging and time is going on and there is nothing I can do about it. But I’m not in heaven yet...I am here. Now. This moment. And I can worship God and glorify Him with this.
Can I choose to take today and use it to glorify God? Can I take all my imperfections, failures, and weaknesses and use them anyway? Can I take the mundane and call it worship?
I can...if I choose. If I see each moment as God’s, not as just another mark of a sin-cursed world. He has a plan far bigger than any I could imagine or hope for. Why not trust Him with it?
Wouldn't you agree?
My heart goes out to those suffering from the events of Boston. I am in no way diminishing that pain and suffering. I know several who had friend’s/relatives/neighbors at the marathon, and I pray your family is safe. Feel free to share your story below!
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